2 sides of the same coin

After my pilgrimage in Spain. M., an old friend, noted that I was a very different person than she knew and remembered. She was both pleased and impressed with the change (and she liked my new me much more than the old one). I didn't really understand what she meant by it, because the only thing that I felt was different was that I didn't feel I was losing, and have to play catch up, in the rat race. As things are changing now in my life now and I try to make the most out of those changes, I'm noticing what M. was referring to ...
I have 2 parts in me that are very different (well I have more, but those are the most noticeable ;-)) from each other: 1. The child with the chip on his shoulder that thinks that everyone is out to get him and thus must be in control, fails, panics and retaliates. 2. The grownup that calmly looks at things, reacts. Hit or miss doesn't panic and doesn't retaliate.
I've noticed that the grownup in me enjoys life, while the child keeps fighting for his survival (or at least feels and thinks as much). A lot of times different people told me that they see potential in me. I never understood what they meant and thus I frowned (the child in me did) or thanked for the the compliment (the grownup in me did). I now know what they meant. Obviously acting as a grownup is much better than being childish. The question is: How do I get the grownup out more? The suggestion box is open and waiting ...